Dave Says

Rental Runaround (August 2016)

Do you think having cancer insurance is a good idea? (July 2015)

Setting up the kid's car insurance (February 2015)

Check cashing for the unbanked (September 2014)

Keep the lifestyle simple (May 2014)

Should she have skin in the game? (September 2013)

Time to pay it off! (September 2013)

Making It Through Medical Leave (July 2013)

Should We Ever Buy A House? (January 2013)

Be Tightfisted Until The Crisis Is Over (January 2013)

Paying the parents (December 2012)

Sallie Mae vs. selling the car (December 2012)

Whatís the worst that can happen? (December 2012)

Letting them in on the secret (December 2012)

Not ready to combine finances (November 2012)

What The Law Will Allow (August 2012)

Making The Right Choice (August 2012)

Baby comes first! (August 2012)

Get the brother-in-law out! (August 2012)

Trust Broken After Cosigning (April 2012)

Review The Research (April 2012)

The Investing Makes Her Nervous (April 2012)

Lifestyle Changes (April 2012)

Do I Tithe On An Inheritance (March 2012)

No Credit Score, No Mortgage? (March 2012)

Where Do Toys Fit In The Baby Steps? (March 2012)

Guilt and Cynicism (March 2012)

Where Does Debt Go When Filing Bankruptcy? (December 2011)

Where Does The Donation Go (December 2011)

Ready to Buy (December 2011)

Intensity Hurting The Marriage (December 2011)

Hobby Car? (November 2011)

Not Quite Dearly DepartedÖ (November 2011)

Enough For Retirement? (November 2011)

Itís Just Another Gimmick (November 2011)

Will Paying Early Help? (November 2011)

Bargain Master! (November 2011)

Sisters Should Have Asked! (August 2011)

Buy Now Or Wait? (August 2011)

So, He Knows How To Manage Money? (August 2011)

Girlfriendís Money Problems (August 2011)

Smaller Down Payment? (August 2011)

Why Canít She Get Another Job? (August 2011)

Landlord Wants Protection (June 2011)

Prepping Kids For Healthy Habits (June 2011)

Switching To Company Debit Cards (June 2011)

Should I Reduce My Tithe? (June 2011)

Closing The Account (February 2011)

Dishonesty Is Not The Best Policy (February 2011)

Piles of Cash? (February 2011)

New Car In A Bad Situation (February 2011)

Drop Coverage? (November 2010)

Can't Pay For Her Wedding (November 2010)

Does Pride Keep Us In Debt? (November 2010)

Not Time For A Reunion (November 2010)

You're Being Hoodwinked! (November 2010)

Buying Used or New? (November 2010)

Is There A Recommended Vacation Percentage? (July 2010)

Donít Do it for the Gas Mileage (July 2010)

Investing Strategy for Retirement (April 2010)

Insurance? (April 2010)

Triple Play Investing (February 2010)

How Do I Get Started in Real Estate (February 2010)

Published: December 2011
Intensity Hurting The Marriage  

Dear Dave,

When does reaching the point of being debt-free become more important than marriage? Weíre following your plan and doing the debt snowball, but my husbandís been working a second job, and itís really cutting into our together-time at night and straining our relationship. Iím afraid weíre going to end up debt-free, but divorced. When does one outweigh the other?

Tracy

Dear Tracy,

Getting out of debt is never more important than your marriage. But families go through all kinds of stuff, and one of those things is cleaning up messes theyíve made. Itís not always fun, but thereís a price to pay if you want to win with your money or anything else.

It sounds to me like your husband has gone gazelle intense about getting out of debt, and in the process may have left you behind a little bit. I donít recommend that! He probably needs to take some time to come back and emotionally re-connect with you. And Iím sure some good, old-fashioned back rubs and words of encouragement from you are in order. Your man could use them if heís been working two jobs!

But thereís plenty of time for snuggling and stuff later. Right now, youíre trying to do somethingósomething really importantófor the good of your family. I know it can be difficult, but it wonít last forever. And I can promise you this: Once youíre done, youíll be very glad you toughed it out!

óDave

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